Change.
Change.
Change.
Nope, no matter how I type it, it still looks like a swear word from where I am sitting.
Comfortable.
Now, there is a word I like.
Life is rarely ideal, but comfortable, that is just about the way I like it.
It is what I know.
What I like, and most importantly, what I can usually predict.
(Unless a hatchling happens to be helpful. This little hatchling handwashes my favourite coffee mug. To help mama, no matter my protests, and I am thankful. Now, the first clue that there was change would have been the half a litre of dish soap gone astray. Nonetheless, my mug of coffee, bubbly coffee, that smelt and tasted of lemon, certainly was not comfortable. Thank you hatchling no 4!)
Motivation.
There is my achilles heel.
I have goals, and I am motivated to try to attain them.
Often this requires change. Dirty word that one.
Even worse, is when the path to my goals changes.
I get all flustered, and start to fear that maybe, my goals have changed, and I must find new goals.
What is up with that?
I hold each goal up to the light, and inspect it carefully before placing it gently back in my 'to accomplish' box.
They (my goals) are steadfast.
Thank goodness.
But the road there is not as simple or as short as I thought.
Go figure, that is blooming par for the course!
I have a handful of hatchlings and as they grow, the world turns and everything changes.
It is enough to make this mama stomp her feet, fling herself on the floor and have a proper paddy.
Honestly, just when I have a perfect set of jigsaw puzzles, a wide range for every age group, the hatchlings, they do not want to play puzzles. Seriously, who is going to play puzzles with me! I still like puzzles...
I digress.
Because the terrible truth is I even seek it out, and I invite it in for tea.
I crave change, and all the new possibilities it brings.
Oh, I am all female! I reserve the right to want it and then fight, kick and scream about it every step of the way.
Yet, I do believe.
I am exactly where I need to be.
And when I think I know what is best for me, when I want to yell, 'but I want, and I want, and I want this!'
I am re - navigated, forced to stare the big ugly, yet harmonious beast of change in the eye.
So, I am going to change and follow the path that is mine to take.
I will change and go where I need to, and try my best to learn all I can from where ever I am meant to be.
And no this is not a potty training post. Just in case anyone had wondered, if perhaps it had actually become a fight of that magnitude. Though honestly, boys do want to do this at some point, like as a commitment right? Not a I can do it correctly thirty times and then not again for two weeks! Just cause ya know, I am just not feeling the potty mojo here. Meh, one day he will want a girlfriend, it has to happen at some point!
Excellent post. I know exactly how you feel.
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