About us

We are a hard working, family of eight. Swimming in the sea when we aren't busy on our small holding. Daddy dragon has to work away a lot, so this blog is to let him keep up with our adventures at home.

Tuesday 20 August 2013

I'm not coping

Father's day form a Daddy's girl



Not once, twice, or even a half dozen times this week, I have been asked, 'Bet, you can't wait for them to go back to school.' And from those who have children, 'Only X more days until they go back to school. It is better than Christmas!!!!'

Thanks, your comment is so thoughtful, said right in front of my children. 

I hope you don't say that to your own children.

But you do, don't you?

Ouch.

And when my children inform you that they do their school work at home, you frown and say, 'I don't know how you cope.'

That's because I'm not coping.

There is nothing to cope with.

Children, contrary to everything our society projects, are not chores. 

They are not problems which must simply be endured. 

They are not a burden. 

They are a gift. An amazing blessing, to be given the opportunity to be present at the start of someone's journey, to be their friend, guide and protector through their most wobbly steps. To build a relationship with someone who comes in to the world, looking to build a relationship with you.

I am told, 'You really should send them to school. You need a break. Every parent needs time away from their children.'

You know what, I agree, everyone needs a little space. (Perhaps that is another post.) 

Yet, I disagree. I do not believe simply because a person is younger than I am, a child as it is defined in our society, that they must be institutionalised. For my benefit? That is quite the statement to give our children. 

Just pause and imagine if the person you trusted most in your life, the person you felt you need and rely on most, told you in no small way, that they couldn't wait to be rid of you. 

Isn't that everyone's worst fear.

And it's coming, getting old is a bitch.

But hey, they are just your children, right?

Those people you spend the most time with, they are the ones who become your most treasured friends.

My children are not just small people for whom I am responsible. 

They are my best friends and I could not have asked for more wonderful people with whom to travel this journey with. 

And I would like to point out that just because someone is younger than you are, does not make them stupid. If you would not speak to your work colleague like that, damn well don't say it to your child. 

5 comments:

  1. I agree wholeheartedly with you. My four children are now grown and flown the nest, but I remember their school holidays and people saying to me that surely I wouldn't be able to wait till they were back at school. I was looked at very strangely when I used to tell people that I dreaded their return to school because I loved having my children at home and spending time with them. I wish that I had homeschooled my children, but it was not something that I had heard of and I simply did not realise that was a possibility. However I am glad that I spent as much time as I could with my children when they were young, it is an oft said fact but no less true for that, children do grow up all too quickly and you do right to make the most of every precious moment.

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  2. Yes! Exactly my status today on fb! I have been asked this 3 times today :-/ lovely read thank you xx

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  3. I love this! I don't have kids yet but from my own experience as being one, I remember the complete terror I went through when I was forced to go to day care and public education. It breaks my heart that this type of mentality is well accepted within our society...why even have kids if you don't want them around?? I recently read an article listing five things that old people regret the most in their death bed, and one of them was overworking and not spending enough time with their children (esp. men). I hope to one day have kids and I plan on home schooling them :) Thanks again for this amazing article!

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  4. Love love!!! I so agree and always feel so sorry for those kids. And their Mamas who are missing lovely days. Homeschooling is the best thing I have ever done. Period.

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  5. I my gosh you really nailed it. All this past week people have been saying these same things. There was one lady that was nice. She said "Your girls will enjoy school soon I am sure." I answered, "Yes They Will!" Enjoy your Not back to school time!! We are.

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